RE: [SLUG] My old flame...

From: Amy Harms (cdragonne@mindspring.com)
Date: Fri Dec 03 2004 - 08:19:03 EST


As someone who is new to this list, I can't agree with you more. I have had
more problems with people either in IM sessions or emails due to
miscommunication and misunderstanding. Unless you are an extremely good
writer in which people can feel your emotions through the written word,
there are going to be misunderstandings. Such is the way with human beings
everywhere.

I think a book should be written. It would be interesting to see the
response.

Thanks for letting me stick in my 2 cents.

Amy
-----Original Message-----
From: slug@nks.net [mailto:slug@nks.net] On Behalf Of steve szmidt
Sent: Friday, December 03, 2004 7:58 AM
To: slug@nks.net
Subject: [SLUG] My old flame...

One of the biggest problem with written communication is that unless noted,

you cannot tell HOW something is communicated. What I mean is that you don't

know if there's a smile on that persons face or evil intent.

Try saying "I hate you!" with a smile on your face and you know what I mean.

As is evident it's how you say something that upsets people, not what they
say. However, when it's written you can't tell how, so you focus on what was

said.

"That hurt, you bastard!" [silly smile] would change everything. You would
know it was not a real upset but a faked one and you can smile with it.

We get into all sorts of misunderstood arguments because of this. Some of us

write rather easily and we all get to partake in arguments between two or
three people, that none are really interested in. Looking closer one can
often see how this is started by misunderstandings that then only gets worse

as each is trying to sort things out in public, but who is at that point
upset too and easily throw out other degrading comments. And it starts all
over.

I had this idea of a book I was going to write which was based on
misunderstoods. It had in it a foreigner (like me), and followed his
escapedes of escalated misunderstandings.

He had a pretty light look on life and took things as it came. Few subjects
were so serious it could not be joked about. Of course there's time and
place, but not being fully familiar with the local customs, he got in
trouble. Continously.

Anyway, even being very aware of how easy you can be misread I often say
things that can still be read differently depending how the reader is
feeling
at that moment.

So please bare this in mind before starting a flame. (It's not that I have
anything against a good argument, or flamewar, but usually only two people
have ANY interest in following it.)

-- 

Steve Szmidt

"They that would give up essential liberty for temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety." Benjamin Franklin ----------------------------------------------------------------------- This list is provided as an unmoderated internet service by Networked Knowledge Systems (NKS). Views and opinions expressed in messages posted are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of NKS or any of its employees.

----------------------------------------------------------------------- This list is provided as an unmoderated internet service by Networked Knowledge Systems (NKS). Views and opinions expressed in messages posted are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of NKS or any of its employees.



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